Sometimes, often when I'm about to go to sleep, I'll start thinking of things I've done in the past that I regret. Here's one such event that I often think about:
On a lovely sunny day in May 2013, I decide to go for walk.
That's when I pased some little girls sitting outside a front garden. (It's not as dodgy as it sounds, I promise.) They had a table full of plastic cups of blackcurrent squash in front of them. "Would you like a cup of squash for 25p?" One of them asked me. I was really taken aback and surprised. I didn't think kids actually sold drinks like squash or lemonade on tables in the real world. I thought it only happened in cartoons or Calvin and Hobbes. Like this:
I was fucking weirded out. I said, "no thanks," and kept on walking. But I had way more than 25p in my wallet! I don't know why I said no to them. I could have had a nice cup of squash and helped them out financially. Upon realising that I had enough money to buy one, I could have turned around and said, "actually, I think I will have one!" But instead, I just kept on walking.
"I bet they put viagra or cyanide in those," I chuckled to myself as I walked away.
I don't know why I didn't buy one of their cups of squash. I sometimes wonder why they were selling them. Were they raising money for a charity? Were they trying to save up for something? It's now a mystery lost to the sands of time.
What if they didn't sell any drinks that day, and I could have been their only customer. Did I cause a long-term adverse effect on their self-esteem? Maybe when they packed away the table they said, "remember that first guy we came across? He was a cunt, wasn't he."
Even though I don't really like young children, I do think it's important to not be a dick to them. And on that day, I failed.